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What to know: A good start, needs some fleshing out.
PLACE OF THE GODS,THE is in the KIDS FIRST! Film Festival - it may not be a regular, endorsed title
Recommended age 12-18
15 minutes
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I rate this 3 out of 5 points, because it lacks a strong storyline and substance. Although it is based on a short story by Stephan Vincent Benet, not everyone has read this story. I am not sure if all teenagers will get what's going on here and it is most suitable for teens. Recommended age: 12-18 It lacks a strong story line and focus. Although I get the main point, I don't easily picture it on the big screen. It is an interesting read but feels that it needs more of a story line. From the stand point of a script, I feel as if I was reading a book or essay, not a screenplay because there are so many descriptive words of what is going on. Stronger dialogue would help a lot. The target audience is for older teens and adults, since it is after the world is pretty much destroyed. The storyline needs further development. It lacks strong direction and sort of fizzles out without taking us anywhere. I rate this 3 points because the storyline needs more work. It shows how the protagonist realizes that the Presidents were human, not Gods. But it also insinuates that they were not intelligent and I had a hard time with this reasoning. Presidents such as Lincoln and Washington were not Gods, only men. I don't think the theme is strong enough. There should be more of a main point. I give this 10 points out of 25, because the storyline is not a strong and lacks development. I could see this developing into something very interesting, but as it is we just get a glimpse of one scene. I would like to see the writer develop this into a full length script. The characters lack depth. The main character, SURREAL is the strongest and although the other characters are minor, I would like to see them more developed. I didn't really feel like I got to know or understand them. I rate this aspect with 6 points. This is where it is really lacking. I give this 6 points. I don't feel that it gives children a real understanding of the world, especially with the focus of how Presidents were before the apocalypse. There is a lesson, but it is not strong. The story line really needs more development. Surreal seems to think that life in her day is much more intelligent, but, I don't see how SURREAL really proves that in the script. I wouldn't say that the script encourages questioning or probing. It could, with more development. It is suitable for the intended age group. The storyline needs more substance and a reason for its purpose. I would like to see a stronger focus and I would to see teenagers curious about the purpose of the story. There are not too many grammar and spelling mistakes. Qualified yes. Meets KIDS FIRST! criteria. Needs more work. It's possible that if I read the short story this script is based on, I might better appreciate the adaptation. However, a screenplay should stand on its own and not require the reader or viewer (once produced) to go back to the original source material. I accept this with the caveat that this is a good start, but needs further development. As it is, I do not find the story line strong enough. The main character is likable, but I the minor characters lack development as does the entire story line. It's a good start.
Considered to be forbidden by the villagers, main character Surreal is guided by her instincts and regardless sets out on her own to discover "The Place of the Gods." Once there, she comes across significant realizations.
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